My Racist Friend
Long-time friends Don Griffin, Jr. and Amy Makice, LCSW explore societal issues through the authentic lens of relational-cultural practices. ’My Racist Friend’ is a podcast about the messy parts of relationships that help us grow together. Through the authentic lens of their strong mutual relationship, their goal is to model difficult conversations that can promote understanding and connection in a world that needs both.
Episodes
Thursday Mar 14, 2024
Episode 4.07: The Country Lane
Thursday Mar 14, 2024
Thursday Mar 14, 2024
Amy and Don dive into the intricacies of popular music and the persistent racism evident in how we react to it. They react to Beyoncé's new hit "Texas Hold'em" and her venture into the country genre, looking at the resistance from certain factions of society and questioning the inherent racial prejudice within it.
Resources mentioned in this episode:
• "Beyoncé - TEXAS HOLD 'EM (Music Video)" posted by rauhlrenhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ycwtqqhV6UE
• "Beyoncé Fan’s Radio Request Reignites Country Music Debate" (NY Times, February 14, 2024, by Emily Schmall)https://www.nytimes.com/2024/02/14/arts/music/beyonce-oklahoma-radio-station.html
• "Dolly Parton congratulates Beyoncé for hitting No. 1 on Billboard Hot Country Chart" (CNN, February 23, 2024, by Marianne Garvey)https://www.cnn.com/2024/02/23/entertainment/dolly-parton-beyonce/index.html
• Black Opry playlists (Spotify)https://open.spotify.com/user/w57z8r3lywbmreubufwxm6vgf?si=OI0KTI1QR8aW3xqLIeA56A&nd=1&dlsi=862ee4561f6c4aad
• "Beyoncé Makes History as First Black Woman Atop Hot Country Songs Chart" (Billboard, February 20, 2024, by Jim Asker, Gary Trust)https://www.billboard.com/music/chart-beat/beyonce-texas-hold-em-number-1-hot-country-songs-chart-1235610582/
• "The Black Origins of Country Music" (JME)https://www.wjct.org/jme/2022/06/the-black-origins-of-country-music/
• "Yup, Lionel Richie Totally Wrote the Second Verse of Kenny Rogers’ ‘Lady’ In the Men’s Room" (Billboard, March 31, 2023, by Gil Kaufman)https://www.billboard.com/music/pop/lionel-richie-wrote-second-verse-kenny-rogers-lady-bathroom-1235296133/
• "What If Brock Purdy Were Black?" (First and Pen, October 30, 2023, by Yussuf Khan)https://firstandpen.com/what-if-brock-purdy-were-black/
• "New evidence shows how badly NFL teams discriminate against Black QBs in the draft" (SF Gate, September 11, 2023, by Marc Delucchi)https://www.sfgate.com/49ers/article/nfl-draft-analysis-racial-bias-quarterbacks-18355172.php
• "NFL Network graphic insinuating Brock Purdy is smarter than Dak Prescott is a bad look" (Deadpan, January 19 2023, by Stephen Knox)https://deadspin.com/dak-prescott-brock-purdy-nfl-total-access-playoffs-1850008853
• "Serena Williams became the greatest tennis player of all-time even as she endured racist and sexist attacks in the media" (Business Insiders, August 13, 2022, by Scott Davis, Trisha Gopal)https://www.businessinsider.com/serena-williams-endured-racism-sexism-media-throughout-career-2022-8
• "The Evolution of Taylor Swift From Country Star to Pop Icon" (Country Living, October 28, 2021, by Charlotte Chilton)https://www.countryliving.com/life/entertainment/g36298587/evolution-taylor-swift/
• "‘DUKES OF HAZZARD’ ACTOR JOHN SCHNEIDER UNDER FIRE FOR ‘RACIST’ REMARKS ABOUT BEYONCÉ SINGING COUNTRY MUSIC: ‘EVERY DOG MUST MARK EVERY TREE, RIGHT?’" (Black Enterprise)https://www.blackenterprise.com/dukes-hazzard-actor-beyonce-dog/
• "Blaming President Donald Trump Is Too Easy: This Is Us. | Deadline | MSNBC" (YouTube, August 5, 2019, by MSNBC)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKiB0APdxTo
• "Chris Stapleton & Justin Timberlake 's Epic Performance | Tennessee Whiskey & Drink You Away" (YouTube, August 18, 2023, by Dennis Mellon)https://www.nytimes.com/2024/02/14/arts/music/beyonce-oklahoma-radio-station.html
• "Billboard removes rapper Lil Nas X from country chart" (AP, March 28, 2019, by Kristin M. Hall)https://apnews.com/article/6045fec139204644b616afb63622c2d9
• "Watch LUKE COMBS & TRACY CHAPMAN Perform "FAST CAR" at the 2024 GRAMMYs" (YouTube, February 15, 2024, by Recording Academy / GRAMMYs)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zEqb6xbeuCo
• "https://www.tiktok.com/@mygayfabulousfarm/video/7335886049572310318" (TikTok, February 17, 2024, by mygayfabulousfarm)https://www.tiktok.com/@mygayfabulousfarm/video/7335886049572310318
• "Ray Charles - Modern Sounds in Country and Western Music" (YouTube, by Concord Records)https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLgWmP-F0RTPOl1OjguwDkKwjFFiMmQZs5
My Racist Friend is a podcast about the messy parts of relationships that help us grow together. Long-time friends Don Griffin, Jr. and Amy Makice, LCSW, enter into a transparent and ongoing conversation about complicated and difficult topics such as racism, gender, and social justice. Through the authentic lens of their strong mutual relationship, their goal is to model difficult conversations that can promote understanding and connection in a world that needs both. In this relationship, Amy is the inherently racist friend, who is working to change and better understand how racism impacts her relationship with people she loves.
Donald Griffin Jr. is a Bloomington native, former Deputy Mayor for Bloomington, and a real estate broker, proudly serving his community for the past three decades. Since opening Griffin Realty in 2003, Don's dedication to excellence has helped to guide his company to be among the top producers in Indiana with nearly a half billion in individual lifetime sales.
Amy Makice, founder of Bloomington Center for Connection, is a licensed psychotherapist based in Bloomington, Indiana. Her professional journey is rooted in her passion for Relational-Cultural Therapy (RCT), and her commitment to RCT extends into community building initiatives to promote the power of connection. Amy helps to bring the Relational Summits to Bloomington, featuring distinguished guests like Maureen Walker, Amy Banks, and Isaac Knapper.
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes
Wednesday Mar 06, 2024
Episode 4.06: Quiet As a Sleeping Army
Wednesday Mar 06, 2024
Wednesday Mar 06, 2024
Don and Amy contemplate Paul Simon lyrics to prompt a discussion of shared suffering and challenges of staying engaged to work toward better things. Other topics along the way include finding a purpose for persisting, news of the death of Nex Benedict, being authentic about your own pain, and love's powerful role in driving life.
Resources mentioned in this episode:
• "The Cool, Cool River" lyrics by Paul Simonhttps://www.paulsimon.com/track/the-cool-cool-river-6/
• "A Federal Investigation Has Been Launched Into Nex Benedict's School District" (Them, March 4, 2024, by James Factor)The Department of Education will investigate whether Owasso Public Schools failed to respond appropriately to bullying and harassment.https://www.them.us/story/a-federal-investigation-has-been-launched-into-nex-benedicts-school-district
My Racist Friend is a podcast about the messy parts of relationships that help us grow together. Long-time friends Don Griffin, Jr. and Amy Makice, LCSW, enter into a transparent and ongoing conversation about complicated and difficult topics such as racism, gender, and social justice. Through the authentic lens of their strong mutual relationship, their goal is to model difficult conversations that can promote understanding and connection in a world that needs both. In this relationship, Amy is the inherently racist friend, who is working to change and better understand how racism impacts her relationship with people she loves.
Donald Griffin Jr. is a Bloomington native, former Deputy Mayor for Bloomington, and a real estate broker, proudly serving his community for the past three decades. Since opening Griffin Realty in 2003, Don's dedication to excellence has helped to guide his company to be among the top producers in Indiana with nearly a half billion in individual lifetime sales.
Amy Makice, founder of Bloomington Center for Connection, is a licensed psychotherapist based in Bloomington, Indiana. Her professional journey is rooted in her passion for Relational-Cultural Therapy (RCT), and her commitment to RCT extends into community building initiatives to promote the power of connection. Amy helps to bring the Relational Summits to Bloomington, featuring distinguished guests like Maureen Walker, Amy Banks, and Isaac Knapper.
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes
Thursday Feb 29, 2024
Episode 4.05: Relational Images
Thursday Feb 29, 2024
Thursday Feb 29, 2024
In this episode, Don and Amy are discuss two RCT concepts: Model Me and Relational Images, those unconscious expectations that shape our interactions. Along the way, the pair talk about self-perceived flaws, binge-watching habits, societal pressures, and negativity fueling success.
My Racist Friend is a podcast about the messy parts of relationships that help us grow together. Long-time friends Don Griffin, Jr. and Amy Makice, LCSW, enter into a transparent and ongoing conversation about complicated and difficult topics such as racism, gender, and social justice. Through the authentic lens of their strong mutual relationship, their goal is to model difficult conversations that can promote understanding and connection in a world that needs both. In this relationship, Amy is the inherently racist friend, who is working to change and better understand how racism impacts her relationship with people she loves.
Donald Griffin Jr. is a Bloomington native, former Deputy Mayor for Bloomington, and a real estate broker, proudly serving his community for the past three decades. Since opening Griffin Realty in 2003, Don's dedication to excellence has helped to guide his company to be among the top producers in Indiana with nearly a half billion in individual lifetime sales.
Amy Makice, founder of Bloomington Center for Connection, is a licensed psychotherapist based in Bloomington, Indiana. Her professional journey is rooted in her passion for Relational-Cultural Therapy (RCT), and her commitment to RCT extends into community building initiatives to promote the power of connection. Amy helps to bring the Relational Summits to Bloomington, featuring distinguished guests like Maureen Walker, Amy Banks, and Isaac Knapper.
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes
Wednesday Feb 07, 2024
Episode 4.04: Katt and Cats and Chicken and T-Rexes
Wednesday Feb 07, 2024
Wednesday Feb 07, 2024
Don and Amy are joined by Jay Filer, a therapist-in-training at the Bloomington Center for Connection, to take a tour of Black Joy (specifically, their Black joy) found on social media. The conversation covers struggles with and benefits of use of social media, as well as some examples of what makes Jay laugh.
After this conversation, TikTok removed sound from many videos due to a copyright dispute with Universal. It is unclear when or if the soundtracks of some of Jay's video links will be restored, but if there is no sound, that is likely why.
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
"Katt Williams Scorches the Earth and Every Comedian on It" (Vulture, 2024)https://www.vulture.com/article/katt-williams-club-shay-shay-interview.html
"The Original Renegade" (The New York Times, 2020)https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/13/style/the-original-renegade.html
"On its 40th anniversary, a look at how 'The Wiz' forever changed Black culture" (Los Angeles Times, 2028)https://www.latimes.com/entertainment/music/la-et-ms-the-wiz-40-anniversary-20181024-story.html
"Millions of videos have been muted on TikTok in 2024 – here’s why" (Push, 2024)https://blog.push.fm/13564/millions-videos-muted-tiktok-2024/
Peach Cobbler (OldCountryCooking5)https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8V8jcoD/
Doing my hair to favorite yt people songs (being.lexiekay)https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8VRv6tT/
#2006 what year next? (vibin.wit.tay)https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8V8d9mx/
Stick figures violently eating mangoes (1_._panda_._1)https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8VR7nXS/
Additional links from Jay:
• Drummers: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8VRnhF7/ • Relationship Hotline: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8V8jfmg/ • Makeup Looks: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8V8ePrj/ • Music: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8V81VCP/ • Friendships: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8V8FBHd/ • More about Friendships: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8VRTUso/
My Racist Friend is a podcast about the messy parts of relationships that help us grow together. Long-time friends Don Griffin, Jr. and Amy Makice, LCSW, enter into a transparent and ongoing conversation about complicated and difficult topics such as racism, gender, and social justice. Through the authentic lens of their strong mutual relationship, their goal is to model difficult conversations that can promote understanding and connection in a world that needs both.
Donald Griffin Jr. is a Bloomington native and real estate broker, proudly serving his community for the past three decades. Since opening Griffin Realty in 2003, Don's dedication to excellence has helped to guide his company to be among the top producers in Indiana with nearly a half billion in individual lifetime sales.
Amy Makice, founder of Bloomington Center for Connection, is a parent educator and licensed psychotherapist based in Bloomington, Indiana. Amy offers individual therapy and parent support for people in the Bloomington area, workshops for parents and caregivers, and training on Relational Cultural theory.
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes
Wednesday Jan 31, 2024
Episode 4.03: A Full Moon in Each Eye
Wednesday Jan 31, 2024
Wednesday Jan 31, 2024
In this episode, hosts Amy Makice and Don Griffin Jr. delve into a thought-provoking conversation about the media's role in shaping perspectives and in turn, dividing society. The discussion ventures into the RCT concepts of "Model Me" and "Not Me" by Dr. Maureen Walker, exploring how extreme identification and fear can obstruct empathy, leading to conflicts.
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
"Admit Something" (Hafiz)https://www.centerforcompassionateleadership.org/admit-something-by-hafiz
"A Few Notes on Love" (The Irreverent Psychologist, 2011)https://irreverentpsychologist.blogspot.com/2011/02/few-notes-on-love.html
My Racist Friend is a podcast about the messy parts of relationships that help us grow together. Long-time friends Don Griffin, Jr. and Amy Makice, LCSW, enter into a transparent and ongoing conversation about complicated and difficult topics such as racism, gender, and social justice. Through the authentic lens of their strong mutual relationship, their goal is to model difficult conversations that can promote understanding and connection in a world that needs both.
Donald Griffin Jr. is a Bloomington native and real estate broker, proudly serving his community for the past three decades. Since opening Griffin Realty in 2003, Don's dedication to excellence has helped to guide his company to be among the top producers in Indiana with nearly a half billion in individual lifetime sales.
Amy Makice, founder of Bloomington Center for Connection, is a parent educator and licensed psychotherapist based in Bloomington, Indiana. Amy offers individual therapy and parent support for people in the Bloomington area, workshops for parents and caregivers, and training on Relational Cultural theory.
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes
Wednesday Jan 24, 2024
Episode 4.02: I Know, You Know?
Wednesday Jan 24, 2024
Wednesday Jan 24, 2024
Don and Amy resume their conversation together with a discussion about needing to feel smart, the ignorance of believing you know everything, and being around people who are willing to work through mistakes. Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Tyriq Memorial Fund (GoFundMe)https://www.gofundme.com/f/tyriq-memorial-fund
Neighbor of house party where 23-year-old fatally shot: ‘We were very lucky’ (WISH-TV)https://www.wishtv.com/news/i-team-8/neighbors-narrowly-miss-gunfire-at-fatal-house-party-shooting/
My Racist Friend is a podcast about the messy parts of relationships that help us grow together. Long-time friends Don Griffin, Jr. and Amy Makice, LCSW, enter into a transparent and ongoing conversation about complicated and difficult topics such as racism, gender, and social justice. Through the authentic lens of their strong mutual relationship, their goal is to model difficult conversations that can promote understanding and connection in a world that needs both.
Donald Griffin Jr. is a Bloomington native and real estate broker, proudly serving his community for the past three decades. Since opening Griffin Realty in 2003, Don's dedication to excellence has helped to guide his company to be among the top producers in Indiana with nearly a half billion in individual lifetime sales.
Amy Makice, founder of Bloomington Center for Connection, is a parent educator and licensed psychotherapist based in Bloomington, Indiana. Amy offers individual therapy and parent support for people in the Bloomington area, workshops for parents and caregivers, and training on Relational Cultural theory.
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes
Wednesday Jan 17, 2024
Episode 4.01: Essentialism
Wednesday Jan 17, 2024
Wednesday Jan 17, 2024
Amy and Don return from a long hiatus to continue their conversations about relationships and the messy parts that make connection difficult. This week, the friends discuss Essentialism, which is found in many social movements and intertwines with racism, transphobia, and the roots of feminism. Amy provides a definition of essentialism and why it is so difficult for her to move through that blocker in relationships.
Additional resources:
Gender essentialism and benevolent sexism in anti-trans rhetoricby S. Atwood, Thekla Morgenroth, Kristina R. Olson (2023)https://spssi.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/sipr.12099?af=R
Challenging Race-Based Medicine Through Historical Education About the Social Construction of Raceby Allison L. Skinner-Dorkenoo, Kasheena G. Rogbeer, Apoorva Sarmal, Cynthia Ware, and Jennifer Zhu (2023)https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC10698761/
Psychologist Carol Gilligan revises revolutionary 'different voice' work to include 'human voice'https://www.wbur.org/hereandnow/2023/10/04/carol-gilligan-human-voice
My Best Writings of 2023by Julia Seranohttps://juliaserano.substack.com/p/my-best-writings-of-2023?utm_source=profile&utm_medium=reader2
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes
Tuesday Mar 30, 2021
Episode 3.11: Making Room for Cognitive Dissonance
Tuesday Mar 30, 2021
Tuesday Mar 30, 2021
This week, Amy and Don welcome Dr. Froswa' Booker-Drew into their conversation. Dr. Booker-Drew is the Vice President of Community Affairs & Strategic Alliances for the State Fair of Texas and shares some of her experiences and insights working with the non-profit community.
Additional resources:
"Froswa' Booker-Drew: A Champion for South Dallas Nonprofits" (Dallas Doing Good, by Roselle Tenorio)https://www.dallasdoinggood.com/doing-good/froswa-booker-drew-a-champion-for-south-dallas-nonprofits
Marybeth Gasman (Wikipedia)https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marybeth_Gasman
"United Way Scandal Puts New Focus on Nonprofit Pay Levels" (Los Angeles Times, by Matt Marshall, Mary 14, 1992)https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1992-05-14-mn-3008-story.html
"The Real Salary Scandal" (Stanford Social Innovation Review, by Peter Manzo, Winter 2004)https://ssir.org/articles/entry/the_real_salary_scandal
"The 20 Best State Fairs in America" (BLT)https://www.vacationsmadeeasy.com/TheBLT/The20BestStateFairsinAmerica.html
Special thanks to BCC interns, Rylie Cook and Constance Johnson, for helping with research for this season.
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes
Thursday Mar 25, 2021
Episode 3.10: Mission Drift
Thursday Mar 25, 2021
Thursday Mar 25, 2021
Prompted by announcements of a price increase for water services and a home-buying incentive to attract new police officers, Amy and Don discuss the complexities of government funding and the mission of policing, sharing some stories of encounters where police were called.
Additional resources:
"Bloomington City Council Approves 18% Water Rate Increase Starting In 2022" (Indiana Public Media, by Ethan Burks, March 18, 2021)https://indianapublicmedia.org/news/city-council-approves-cbu-water-rate-increase-starting-in-2022.php
"Bloomington Outlines Incentives To Attract New Police Officers" (Indiana Public Media, by Adam Pinsker, March 12, 2021)https://indianapublicmedia.org/news/bloomington-outlines-incentivestoattract-new-police-officers.php
"Bloomington City Council approves $166 million city budget for 2021" (Indiana Daily Student, by Mel Fronczek, October 15, 2020)https://www.idsnews.com/article/2020/10/bloomington-city-council-approves-166-million-city-budget-for-2021-covid-19-recovery
"Alternatives to the Police" (McGill Daily, by Evan Dent, Molly Korab, and Farid Rener, March 2018)https://www.mcgilldaily.com/PoliceIssue/Restorative-Justice.html
Mandate In-Service Training (IN.gov, ILEA)https://www.in.gov/ilea/2525.htm
Special thanks to BCC interns, Rylie Cook and Constance Johnson, for helping with research for this season.
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes
Wednesday Mar 17, 2021
Episode 3.09: Fighting Time
Wednesday Mar 17, 2021
Wednesday Mar 17, 2021
Don and Amy welcome back Dr. Amy Banks, who brings her co-author, Isaac Knapper, to discuss their upcoming book, "Fighting Time"—a story of their 36-year journey from murder to meeting. Dr. Banks' father, Ronald, was shot and killed on April 29, 1979, as he left the Hyatt Regency hotel in New Orleans. Isaac, who along with Amy was 16 at the time, was wrongfully convicted of the murder and sentenced to life imprisonment without parole in the Louisiana State Penitentiary. She and her younger sister, Nancy, traveled to meet and ultimately befriend Isaac in 2015.
Additional resources:
"Fighting Time" (Regal House Publishing, by Amy Banks and Isaac Knapper, 2021)https://www.regalhousepublishing.com/product/fighting-time/
"How Can White Folks Join the Fight to End Systemic Racism?" (Pact Press, by Amy Banks, September 16, 2020)http://pactpress.com/2020/09/how-can-white-folks-join-the-fight-to-end-systemic-racism/
"The Social Impact of Wrongful Conviction" (YouTube, Wellesley Centers for Women, April 7, 2017)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=10kzlovflQ8
"Wrongly Incarcerated Singer Archie Williams Delivers Unforgettable Song - America's Got Talent 2020" (YouTube, by America's Got Talent, May 22, 2020)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShgOH1u78XA
"What AGT didn't tell you about Archie Williams | America's Got Talent 2020" (YouTube, by Epic Top Trending, May 30, 2020)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-lRVS9DNK0
"The last time New Orleans Mardi Gras parades were canceled, here's what happened" (NOLA, by Matt Sledge, February 7, 2021)https://www.nola.com/entertainment_life/mardi_gras/article_3ab27242-6804-11eb-b241-176657eea9a2.html
Banks v. Hyatt Corp. (April 11, 1984)https://www.ravellaw.com/opinions/e61e4dbb2ff1dfc5691f607065c49c0c
Special thanks to BCC interns, Rylie Cook and Constance Johnson, for helping with research for this season.
Buy "Your Racist Friend" by They Might Be Giants on iTunes